For a variety of reasons, some of them weak (e.g. it's -20 outside, and I can't bear to leave the house and go to the gym), some of them utterly farcical (e.g. my left thumb sort of hurts), I haven't been good about working out over the past few weeks.
No, not good at all.
That hasn't meant, however, that I've been extra careful about my caloric intake. The past week in particular, with the various birthday treats I've allowed myself (culminating in a truly wondrous tapas meal last Friday night), has left me feeling doughy and slightly too large for my skin.
I'm also constantly surrounded by food at work, and despite my best intentions, I find myself nibbling on cookies, bagels, and other pointless things, just because they're available. Bad, bad, WG!
I know from past experience that after one good week back at the gym, I'll feel much better, both physically and emotionally, but unfortunately I have a doctor's appointment today.
I would love to postpone it by two weeks, but since I've already done that twice, my conscience (and Darren, whom I told about the canceled appointments) won't let me wiggle out of it again.
Normally what I hate about these appointment with my endocrinologist is the blood draw (at least five vials), but this time what I'm really dreading is the weigh-in.
It's not that my doctor (a fellow Macalester grad, as it turns out) will shame me or scold me if I'm up a few pounds from six months ago, but he'll express kind and reasonable concern, and that's actually worse, because I know he's right.
He'll encourage me (again) to take the clinic's four week course on nutrition, and I'll counter (again) that I know all about good nutrition, but I often choose to ignore what I know in favor of what I want. (If only I had the iron will of some bloggers.)
On the other hand, I suppose I could luck out...
Oh, to face such humiliation on a Tuesday. Sigh.
* For those of you who don't have every bit of dialog in the first three Star Wars movies memorized, "Bu shuda" is Jabba the Hutt's first line in Return of the Jedi. But just FYI, there are bigger geeks than me. Who knew?